Sweaty Palms

A month flew by and before I knew it I had mustered up the guts to meet with my wonderful youth pastor, Jamie Schulz. I'm sure I had other reasons too...but, I knew it was time to throw out there the idea of Uganda.

I was stinkin' nervous.
        So nervous...it took me until close to the end of our time to finally blurt it out.
                   You know when you open your mouth but nothing comes out?
                                  Yep...that happened to me too many times.

Needless to say I blurted it out there and to my surprise she was 100% on board. Jamie encouraged me, brainstormed with me, and dreamed with me.  I left feeling excited and so blessed. And that's where it began.

I talked with Jamie's husband, my youth pastor, Danny Schulz. We made a plan and began going down the list of people we had to talk with to get approval. Those few weeks were the most thrilling, outrageous, and slightly agonizing weeks I walked through. Having to wait for that last approval was like pulling teeth. I felt like it couldn't come fast enough.

And there it was.

I woke up in the middle of the night to an email.

The answer was yes. 

I can finally sleep!

I was stunned at how fast God opened doors to make this trip possible. And was equally in shock that I, the girl who is afraid of any sort of insect, was traveling to Uganda. But, in my spirit...I knew this was right. I had heard from God, I could hear His heart for this trip, and I am going. 

My life will never be the same.

And I couldn't be happier.

All the last details came into place like dates and a few extra decisions. But the final cherry on the top was my conversation I had to have with my boss at the time. I was going to ask him if I could take a leave of absence. 

Quick background on my boss.

I knew Larry at my previous job, then moved to my current job to work for him. 

Him and his wife, Teena, are people I have grown very close with.  

At the time of this conversation he was my boss...

....but, now I don't call him my boss, they are family.

(Rabbit Trail: turned into a bigger blessing than I knew it would).

And as excited as I was to share the news I was beyond nervous. It felt like torture to keep all of this from them, but there was no need to ruffle any feathers before I had all the details.

Before I knew it.

The day came.

It was funny. 

I was awkward, they new something was up, & I waited all night to spill the beans.

But - when I did... 

It was the best conversation that was had since Uganda was brought up.

There was a mix of sweaty palms (me), some excited screaming (Teena knew that Uganda was a dream), and even some teary eyes. It was a conversation I'll never forget. One that God strategically orchestrated that has shaped the trip and even who I am. 

With no doubt in their minds I had my job when I came back.  I left their house astounded.  And came home with tears in my eyes happily telling my mom about not only my job, but also about this new dynamic to our relationship that was birthed. 

So, there you have it. God poured out blessings upon blessings. And I still enjoy reflecting on those couple short months seeing how God moved and His master craftsmanship at display in my life. 

5 Short Hours

I have always wanted to go see & visit Bend, Oregon. Why you ask? Well, quite a chunk of important people have lived there for a large duration of their lives. People I call my youth pastors, people I have served along side of for the last few years, and people I happily call my friends.

...Plus, I've heard it's beautiful and doesn't emit a smell that Nampa so graciously slaps you in the face with.

The same day that God woke up me up early (previous blog post) is the same day I found I had the chance to pack some things and head on over.  After a quick conversation, and a day of waiting to confirm, I woke up on a Friday morning excited to see a place that has shaped the lives' of many people I hold dear to my heart.

Later that day I drove over with my youth pastors and another friend of mine. It was fun, for many reasons:

1. I LOVE road trips
2. I was with my youth pastors
3. We laughed a ton! Talked about ministry, marriage, heard funny stories about their best friends who live in Uganda
4. And of course, we ate! My favorite :)

We traveled there to participate in the ALS Walk (google it if you don't know what it is).  So, the next morning we woke up, joined tons of people at Westside Church, threw on a blue shirt to show support of Steve Stern (who has been diagnosed w/ALS) and joined the army of Team Stern!

This was the day. The day I will always remember. In the whirlwind of meeting new people, eating pancakes, laughing, & walking in the ALS Walk God began to flood my thoughts & heart with the deep realization of how much I truly love His people. While we made the march as Team Stern, I saw all the people that have joined together and couldn't help but feel a deep love for each one of them. It was like a strong wind came & knocked off my glasses. But, instead of picking up my old ones, I picked up glasses that saw people through the eyes & the heart of the Lord. 

I remember talking to Pastor Jamie expressing how much I love people. I began envisioning these people come to realize how much the Lord deeply & earnestly loves them...and I would assume some of them have no idea of that truth.

I was done for after that.

We drove home that same day (yep, it was a short trip). Which means, I spent 5 solid hours with the consuming thought about my heart for God's people. Somewhere along the lines the idea of missions and God's heart intertwined. And the only thought that kept pulsing in my heart was,

...what if?

What if I traveled to another country longer than a 2 week mission trip?

What if what I was dreaming was actually just a small portion of God's bigger plan?

What if I decided to pick up and go serve Brent & Virginia in Uganda?

Think of all the people.

Sometimes when I have dreaming sessions with the Lord I can visually see multitudes of people receiving the love of Christ.  People that have never understood their worth & value begin to experience God's consuming love for them.  I see the people I pastor now and dream that those are the ones that are helping me to spread the gospel. 

Multitudes. 

It rocks me every time.

...ok, now to get back to my story. 

I spent 5 short hours dreaming with God. Dreaming about all the, "What if's." I was stirred. And yes, I was tired. But, I came home different. A short, 2 day trip left me beckoning for more. I felt like I was at the edge of the ocean with giant waves of God's heart, dreams, & plans continuing to wash over me.  Except, what I really wanted was to be out there, surfing the waves of destiny. 

I didn't go to a church conference. I didn't talk to the visiting missionary from Uganda much. And to be honest didn't talk about ministry with many people.

I was simply being overtaken by the voice of God. So sweet and yet so clear.

God is big. 

I was ready to do big things.

To be a vessel in reaching the nations.

...I just wasn't sure when, where, & how yet.

I Sat, He Spoke, I Wrote

On September 8, 2011 at about 5:00 AM I was enjoying the last bit of my wonderful night's sleep to find myself roll over, wide awake as if I had been up already for a couple hours.

...if you must know one (not so important) fact about me, it is that I have always loved my sleep. To the point that I don't like dreaming at night (yes, even happy ones). I don't ever feel rested and am not happy to loose any amount of sleep. Although as much as I hate it, it doesn't stop my overly active imagination to dream away on a weekly (and most commonly nightly) basis.

...also, I NEVER and I mean NEVER wake up before my alarm clock. I use every last minute before I have to roll out of my amazingly warm bed.

So, to find myself wide awake, before the jolting sound of my alarm clock fires off, my first thought was that it was God. He wanted to speak to me. And, even if it wasn't and I was just extremely rested it didn't hurt to spend a bit more time with Him.

And this is where it began. 

I sat.

He spoke.

I wrote.

He spoke phrases, scriptures, instructions, and most importantly made His heart very clear. And I mean clear...clear enough for "sleep Rose" to undoubtedly hear and understand Him. 

Except, what I understood was only a small portion of what was to come. Some of what He spoke sounded good, but I wasn't quite tracking with Him. But, who am I to complain! God wanted to speak and I most definitely wanted to listen, even if I didn't understand what some of it meant. 

Little did I know it was a strategic plan from God. 

He planted the first seed.

He spoke the first words.

He began to prepare my heart.

...I just didn't know what He was really up to...

Unexpected Twist

Things have unexpectedly changed in my life. 

Uganda, Africa

God has surprisingly, & quite quickly, caused those 2 words to bring a complete shift to my life.  In just 5 quick months I have gone from:

Planning to start a couple online PBC classes in the spring 

...TO...

being overtaken with the call from God to take a season out of 2012 to serve Brent & Virginia Earwicker in Uganda.   

It's been a whirlwind to say the least.  A bit surprising for...well, just for me.  Everyone else that has known me longer than a year seems to hint that it makes perfect sense that I am going. My thoughts have shifted from what's the next Youth Staff meeting going to be about, to what tools are needed to be successful for administrative help.

So, here I am. Excited to begin taking you through this journey of mine.  One that has brought a smile to my face, tears to my eyes, and excited anticipation to see God move while I'm there.

With all of that being said, keep checking in.  From this post on I will be sharing the fun & interesting events on how God has first laid Uganda on my heart, what are the current steps & battles I am quickly moving through in the days leading up to my departure date, & what God's plans will be while I am on African soil.  Stay tuned!